New York (Storch Report) — It’s been some time since we looked in on Bill and Hillary Clinton having breakfast in their home in Chappaqua NY, I think it may have been during Hillary’s first run for President against Obama circa, 2008.
There’s been a lot of water over the dam and under the bridge since then, but if I’m not mistaken they were having Eggs Benedict at the time and Bill might have even had a third, albeit with an admonition from Hillary.
We looked in on them again since she announced she was once again running for president after serving under the Obama administration as Secretary of State.
Bill has since lost a lot of weight having experienced some cardiovascular problems and subsequently undergoing heart surgery and has become a vegan; on the other hand Hillary, . . . well, she now only wears pants suits by Oscar de la Renta and moo moo gowns by the same designer while claiming she and Bill were broke and in debt after leaving the White House.
While that was not true then, what is true today is they are multimillionaires.
When we looked in on them this time for breakfast, Bill was having sun-dried tomato mushroom and a spinach tofu quiche and she was having a Burrito from the local Chipotle chain.
They talked a bit about the soft launch for president which she executed with a Twitter tweet and a YouTube video and then a caravan of ‘Scooby’ Do vans to the Midwest refusing to meet with the media.
While the vans were collecting mileage she was once again collecting scandals now from her not so distance past, a Clinton trait the family blames on the ‘right wing conspiracy,’ which has been wrongly stalking them since they entered public service.
The conversation at breakfast went something like this:
H: “Bill, I’m concerned about this Peter Schweizer book that connects contributions from foreign governments to the Clinton Foundation and your speaking engagement fees to a deal approving the sale of US uranium to Russia while I was Secretary of State. There is an appearance of a conflict of interest. That damn Putin is selling the uranium to Iran, while Obama is trying to work out a deal to delay the development of a bomb until he is out of office. And he controls half of the uranium in the world.”
B: “Hill, cool it. You are the Queen for the Dems, you will achieve your coronation by the Party . . . they have no one else, believe me we will be back in the White House. I know Washington DC, it is a ‘pay for play’ beltway where you slosh around peddling influence for cash — it’s common practice in DC. And furthermore the voters know and accept this. We just have to weather the storm; we have been through it before.”
H: “Are you enjoying your vegan breakfast?”
B: “You’ve got to be kidding, I’d rather have a Big Mac.”
H: “Listen Bill, you’ve got to stay on your vegan diet until I get in the White House.”
B: “Well, you are what you say you are. Not a Tammy Wynette, Stand by your Man kind of gal.”
H: “Listen Bill, you got $500,000 and more for 11 speeches and some $145 million came into the Foundation involving the uranium deal and all of this took place while I was Secretary of State. And now the Foundation has to refile five years of tax returns as a result of not reporting foreign contributions. On top of this our expenses of $70 million for travel billed to the Foundation doesn’t look good. And, I’m not happy that we involved Chelsea in the Foundation.”
B: “Look, she did well when she issued that statement today that the left wing media was in ‘cahoots’ with the right wing conspiracy. Let’s face it the Foundation is a ‘cash cow’ that just keeps giving . . . a quid pro quo. Let’s not forget it is the piggy bank that put her and husband and baby in an $8 million penthouse in Manhattan. I wouldn’t worry about it, all of your emails during this period of time have been erased from our server, a kind of Nixonion pay back. ”
H: “I’m concerned, I don’t like the direction this is taking.”
B: “Just remember what everyone thinks P.T Barnum said, ‘There’s a sucker born every minute.’ It wasn’t Barnum that said it, it was his rival David Hannum, but it was Barnum that took advantage of the aphorism. I say, Bring in the Clowns, we will reap the benefits of their votes.”
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If you enjoy satire there is more where this came from in the book by Don entitled, “If a passive-progressive leads from behind, he is a double oxymoron,” a collection of satire. You can buy the book by clicking here.